J.C. Romero is headed to the DL after contorting himself all goofy-like during last night's loss, straining his calf in the process. He'll be replaced by Mike Zagurski, but that's only because it's 2011. In another couple of years, he could be replaced by a robot like the one throwing out the first pitch at Wednesday's Phillies game. From the AP:
But the one-armed, three-wheeled robot, designed by engineers at the University of Pennsylvania, will throw out the ceremonial first pitch before Wednesday’s game between the Philadelphia Phillies and Milwaukee Brewers.
[...]
They started with a Segway, gave it a robotic arm and added a third wheel. They also gave it a pneumatic cylinder, which delivers a burst of compressed carbon dioxide to power the pitch.
Did you know Paulie's robot from Rocky has its own wiki entry? "I wanted a sports car, not no walking trash can!"
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In the future, pitchers might not even need to eat real human food like doughnuts, as robots could potentially be playing the game and writing the recaps as well. We're all screwed.
At least we know the robot can't do much worse than notable first pitch failures like Babba Booey or Barack Obama. Or Kyle Kendrick for that matter.