DJ Bean's NFL Power Prankings: Ranking reactions to Smith's injury
Welcome to the Power Prankings, a mutation of something intended to mock power rankings but instead is just a silly little list. This week's topic is reactions to Alex Smith's disgusting injury, which leaves Washington with Colt McCoy (or possibly Mark Sanchez) in charge of a quest to hold onto the top spot in a bad division.
5. 'IT CAME 33 YEARS TO THE DAY' OF JOE THEISMANN'S (last week: 21)
Who cares? Thirty three years? What's the significance of that? It would be one thing if it were a round number like 30 or 50 years, but 33? Name one cool thing that's happened at a 33rd birthday party or 33rd anniversary party. You can't because one's never been thrown.
4. NATHAN PETERMAN JOKE (last week: 1)
I'm unfortunately not in a position to mock people who all made the same "sign Nathan Peterman haha" joke because I did it as soon as I saw the injury, too.
3. WHAT ABOUT KAEPERNICK?
[Disclaimer: I like Kaepernick more off the field than I did on the field. I thought he was a so-so quarterback who was only getting worse, but I admire and agree with how he used his platform to shine a light on racial injustice.]
The Kaepernick discussion will always be amazing because on one side you have jersey-burning idiots, and on the other side you have people unwilling to consider that there's more to Kaepernick being out of the league than his peaceful protests. An important question that goes ignored as everyone yells about it on Twitter is what kind of contract he'd want.
2. 'I CAN'T LOOK AT IT' (last week: 44)
There are a lot of people who haven't watched a second of Redskins football this season. It would be weird to start with the worst part.