By the time the “official” NFL schedule release is released, most everyone knows their team’s full slate of games. In the Bears’ case, Danny Parkins graced fans with the entire schedule over seven hours before the league shared the news. And yet, the schedule release is still an event of sortsー at least on social media. It’s become a tentpole event for each team’s social media departments. Having a funny or clever way to reveal all the games on Twitter is now a must. That doesn’t mean all schedule release videos are created equal however. Some are slam dunks, and some miss the mark. So, without further ado, here is our extremely scientific and definitive ranking of each Witty Schedule Release Video.
NO. 1 - LOS ANGELES CHARGERS
The Chargers have been known for their top-tier social media presence for several years, and they delivered again. It’s catchy. It’s creative. The jokes are scathingー especially the Urban Meyer slam. It’s perfect.
NO. 2 - DALLAS COWBOYS
Leaning into the constant beef between Stephen A. Smith and the Cowboys is a really funny idea, and it’s executed well. I also love the idea of Jerry Jones putting in the work to pull one over on Smith. High production value too. Great job Cowboys!
NO. 3 - CAROLINA PANTHERS
The Panthers went all-in on 90’s nostalgia, and they did it well. Every reference, and every game reveal was a fun easter egg. Take me back to the days of NES cartridges, and Bagel Bite / Dunkaroo lunches.
NO. 4 - TENNESSEE TITANS
Instead of creating a silly video, the Titans opted to use the platform to share some history, and highlight some local business in the Jefferson St. area一 a historic center for Black culture only a few miles away from Nissan Stadium. Going forward, the Titans say they’ll spotlight one of the businesses from the video in each of their home games this year. A novel, forward-thinking way of using this space.
NO. 5 - PITTSBURGH STEELERS
This vid has a little bit of everything. It’s got your mockumentary style confessionals, it’s got a cameo from Hall of Famer Franco Harris, it’s even got a Wilhelm scream and a slo-mo Ave Maria sequence. The icing on the cake is Ocean’s 11-style twist with a real life tie-in to Harris leaking the schedule from his personal account.
NO. 6 - ARIZONA CARDINALS
The Cardinals showed kids their opponents’ logos and had them guess the names. It was cute and led to some genuinely funny answers. Bet you can’t guess which team ended up as the Flaming Wolf Chickens.
NO. 7 - ATLANTA FALCONS
Everyone loves a Rube Goldberg machine, and this earns bonus points for looping perfectly at the end of the video! The Matt Ryan and Saints disses were solid, and I appreciate that the video is less than a minute long. But using the QR code just to go to the team’s home site felt like a missed opportunity.
NO. 8 - MINNESOTA VIKINGS
This video finds the perfect stupid silly tone. Plus, who doesn’t want to see John Randle answer a shell phone to speak with a dolphin, or watch Randle torch a giant chunk of cheese. Hearing his British accent when saying, “Cheerio, we’re going to jolly ol’ London,” was a treat, too.
NO. 9 - DETROIT LIONS
Another video that did a great job of not taking itself too seriously (see snake in boots and throwing a fish to distract a Dolphin). Using a guy who seems like a real self-defense teacher and not an actor was a creative take, too. In the joke department, the Seahawks and Jets slams were top notch. This vid could be the Lions’ biggest win of the season.
NO. 10 - TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS
It feels like the Bucs just put Tristan Wirfs in front of a green screen, gave him some props to play with and said “Do whatever you want,” and it worked. Wirfs is naturally charming and his little quips are perfect for this type of content.
NO. 11 - WASHINGTON COMMANDERS
“Who doesn’t love watching people destroy things with sledgehammers in super slo-mo?” That’s probably how the pitch for this video went, and honestly whoever did pitch this video wasn’t wrong. The gusto with which Charles Leno Jr. tore apart the teddy bear was something to behold, too.
NO. 12 - CINCINNATI BENGALS
Animating a bunch of stock photos was a good idea. Having Joe Burrow ride a flying buffalo wing over Niagara Falls was a great idea.
NO. 13 - NEW YORK GIANTS
Eli Manning was a good sport and really embraced the self-deprecating humor. That always scores points in my book. Somehow the Giants were the only ones to roast the Commanders name change, too.
NO. 14 - DENVER BRONCOS
The Broncos opted for some sketch comedy rather than a real schedule reveal, probably knowing most fans would have the full slate of games already. Cheers to Russell Wilson, Peyton Manning and Ian Rapoport for buying in and clearly giving their all out there. Some solid jokes, but the video’s a little long, coming in at 3:29. This is Twitter, we don’t have the attention span for all of that!
NO. 15 - HOUSTON TEXANS
The Texans rose to the challenge of combining mid-2000’s nostalgia with comedy. The spoof of “You’re Watching the Disney Channel” bumps is great for a lot of the Twitter audience. Pairing it with the laughably awful drawings people tried to make with the “magic wand” was a great choice, too.
NO. 16 - BALTIMORE RAVENS
It’s short, it’s sweet, it’s got John Harbaugh and Roger Goodell, it’s got some poor social media guy getting decked for real, and it’s under a minute. Bravo.
NO. 17 - LOS ANGELES RAMS
The Rams are a Hollywood team and they leaned into their Hollywood vibes with a big-budget heist video. It works, but nothing mind blowing. Also, can someone please explain what Celine Dion has to do with the schedule??
NO. 18 - CHICAGO BEARS
At first this seems like an extremely lame video. But as it goes on the joke becomes clear, and it’s tough not to smile by the end. The hand drawn logos are a nice touch, too.
NO. 19 - NEW ORLEANS SAINTS
Watching Juvenile play charades really is pure joy, but the pictionary section wasn’t as strong and this video is way too long.
NO. 20 - LAS VEGAS RAIDERS
This was less of a schedule reveal and more of a commercial to buy tickets at Allegiant Stadium. The drone shots of Vegas were cool. Plus, who doesn’t want to read how awesome Allegiant Stadium is, from the likes of Marie Osmond, Lil John and Diplo? Extra points for keeping the video under 90 seconds, knowing they were kinda phoning it in.
NO. 21 - NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
This is peak Patriots. Having Bill Belichick’s secret weapon Ernie Adams read the names off a white board works, even if it’s nothing exciting. The “Pink Stripes” nod to previous Pats lore is fun too. This is more successful than other teams who tried something similar, largely because of Adams’ reaction to football in Las Vegas.
NO. 22 - GREEN BAY PACKERS
Going with a Golden Tee spoof was a good idea, but this vid noticeably lacks in the joke department. The nostalgia is fun, but unlike the Panthers vid, after the first few holes the schtick is pretty much played out.
NO. 23 - BUFFALO BILLS
I’ve never understood ASMR videos and I never will. That said the foley work is impressive, and I appreciate the irreverence.
NO. 24 - CLEVELAND BROWNS
The whole video is based on one self-deprecating goof. It’s cute, but nothing special.
NO. 25 - INDIANAPOLIS COLTS
This feels like a half-baked idea based around Matt Ryan’s nickname Matty Ice. At least it’s short.
NO. 26 - NEW YORK JETS
Like most things Jets, this was pretty uninspiring.
NO. 27 - JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS
The Jags opted for your run of the mill hype video after spending approximately a trillion dollars in free agency. My reaction to the video and the majority of the free agents signings is the same, too: meh.
NO. 28 - SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS
Going with the sepia tones and dramatic music fit the 1849 vibe, but the obscure images used to represent each team were a little too obscure at points. For instance, I had to go back to the Week 11 slide several times before spotting the Cardinal in the corner.
NO. 29 - KANSAS CITY CHIEFS
The Chiefs clearly have had to cut costs around the organization to afford Patrick Mahomes’ insane contract, because we literally just sit and watch Andy Reid read the teams off of a sheet of paper after a brief, uninspiring intro.
NO. 30 - PHILADELPHIA EAGLES
I have legit no idea what this is, but somehow it’s still not the worst video in the league.
NO. 31 - SEATTLE SEAHAWKS
Hey Seahawks, your apathy is showing. We get it, Russell Wilson is gone, it’s tough to get excited. But wow, just putting out a FOUR-MINUTE highlight reel with the games listed is really doing the minimum.
NO. 32 - MIAMI DOLPHINS
The Dolphins social media team is clearly still reeling from sending an anti-hype video of Tua Tagovailoa underthrowing Tyreek Hill when the guys were messing around on the field, because I couldn’t find any schedule release vid. So instead, here’s that embarrassing video of Hill having to turn around to catch that wobbly ball.