Jay Cutler's chickens are in danger.
To be more specific, there's a chicken serial killer on the loose. On Jay Cutler's farm. Eating Jay Cutler's chickens.
The mood? Tense. There are concerns that it's an inside job, and Thelma the farm cat – who looks nice and sweet, but is a savage with loose morals – may be killing chickens under the cover of night. I am not making any of this up, this is all happening exactly as it reads, and it's happening right now on Jay Cutler's farm:
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The good news is that Jay got Blake, his chicken guy, to drop off a few more chickens – a few reds, a couple browns. Just normal chicken guy stuff:
And the even better news is that Jay Cutler's going to stay up – and hidden, duh – all night watching over the chicken coop. I'm not sure what'll happen when he runs into whatever mid-sized carnivore is eating his chickens but I am sure that my soul won't rest until I find out.
Good luck Jay. Good luck Jay Cutler's chickens.
