White Sox

Sox Drawer: The Ozzie Guillen Show

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Sox Drawer: The Ozzie Guillen Show

Tuesday, October 27th
When Emile Berliner invented the microphone in 1876, I imagine he had no idea the kind of words man would say one day into his little creation.

So it is with great excitement (for us), and extreme fear for others (the FCC, Fox executives) that Ozzie Guillen has been hired to be a pre- and postgame analyst for the World Series starting on Wednesday.

Youve heard about Must-See TV. Could this become Must-Bleep TV?

Ozzie has been known to say (and swear about) some crazy things as manager of the White Sox. In fact, there are times when his sentences contain more cuss words than clean words.

Its one of his many talents.

But honestly, unless former Sun-Times columnist Jay Mariotti sneaks onto the set and challenges him to a verbal duel, I dont see Guillen turning into Sam Kinison when the red light goes on, forcing censors to beep out the broadcast as if it was a test from the Emergency Broadcast System.

Still, Ozzie will be Ozzie. What will he do? What will he say? Who knows??

But if I know this White Sox manager, here are 10 things I am confident that Ozzie will not say during his World Series appearances:

10. Nick Swisher? I was totally wrong about that guy. The two of us should have been best friends, yoga partners, baseballs version of Laverne and Shirley. I miss him. Every. Single. Day.

9. Is it me or does C.C. Sabathia look a whole lot slimmer?

8. Sorry guys, I have to leave early tonight. I made plans to see the new Michael Jackson movie with Bartolo Colon.

7. I knew that Jimmy Rollins was going to lay down that squeeze bunt in the 9th, because we talked about it this morning on Facebook.

6. Speaking of Facebook, I cant believe Robinson Cano unfriended me! He says I update my status too often. I mean, I only do it like 15-20 times a day. Is there something wrong with that?

6. Dont stop belieeeeeevin!

5. Did you see Curb Your Enthusiasm last night? How about Mad Men?

4. Ozzie: I think Jerry Yang is one of the greatest bluffers of all-time. He always senses weakness. Hell raise and raise again even if hes only got a pair of threes. What a great competitor!

Chris Rose: Um, Ozzie. This isnt the World Series of Poker. This is the actual World Series.

Ozzie: @&!

3. I hate Wrigley Field. (actually, Ozzie might find a way to say this. He always does.)

2. Can we stop for a second and give a standing ovation for the umpires? What an incredible job they have done during the playoffs. They havent missed a THING.

1. Wheres Bill Melton?

White Sox Talk Podcast: What it would take for the White Sox to sign Manny Machado

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USA TODAY

White Sox Talk Podcast: What it would take for the White Sox to sign Manny Machado

It might be a long shot for the White Sox to sign free agent Manny Machado, but here on the White Sox Talk Podcast, we like dark horses. Chuck Garfien, Ryan McGuffey and Vinnie Duber discuss what it would take to bring Machado to the South Side. Plus, is he "the" guy the White Sox are targeting this offseason? Will the Rockies listen to trade offers for Nolan Arenado a year before he reaches free agency? Plus, Chuck talks about a cost-controlled, All-Star on a rebuilding team that could be an answer at third base.

Listen to the full podcast here or via the embedded player below:

On this day in 2005: White Sox pitchers put the CG in Chicago

On this day in 2005: White Sox pitchers put the CG in Chicago

Mark Buehrle. Jon Garland. Freddy García. José Contreras.

The 2005 White Sox had four consecutive complete games to finish off the 2005 ALCS — Contreras took his turn in Game 5 against the Angels 13 years ago Tuesday. How special was that run of starting pitching to finish that series? Consider the following six statements:

— No team has had more than two complete games in a single postseason, let alone a postseason series, since.

— There has been a grand total of four complete games in 188 postseason games (through Monday) since the beginning of 2016.

— Those 2005 White Sox remain the only team with four complete games in a single LCS (which went to a best-of-seven format in 1985).

— They are the only team since the 1968 Tigers (in the World Series) with at least four complete games in any postseason series.

— They are the only team since the 1956 Yankees (in the World Series) with at least four consecutive complete games in a series. (The Yankees had five in a row: Games 3 through 7.)

— They are the only team since the 1928 Yankees (in the World Series) with at least four consecutive complete-game wins in a series (Games 1 through 4).

Take a moment to look back and appreciate what Don Cooper’s troops were able to accomplish in that series. The way the game is played nowadays, we will never see it again.