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As Doug Llewellyn used to say, “Don’t take the law into your own hands by making it rain bullets on your enemies, you take ‘em to court.” Then again, our memory might be a bit fuzzy as to the precise language Llewellyn used to close out each episode of The People’s Court. Regardless, Pacman Jones apparently won’t be making it rain bullets on ESPN in response to the report that he instigated another strip-club shooting in 2007. Instead, he’ll sue. “It will be a lawsuit in a week against ESPN,” Jones said, according to the Dallas Morning News. “That’s stupid. It’s so stupid I have no more comments.” Before filing that lawsuit, Pacman or his lawyer would be wise to consider the concept of defamation. Yes, whenever false things are said about a public figure with knowledge that the statements are false or with reckless disregard as to their truth or falsity, liability technically arises. But the plaintiff’s damages are based on the injury to his pre-existing reputation. In this case, the plaintiff’s pre-existing reputation could not be much worse. So, Pacman, you can save both yourself and ESPN a lot of stress and worry by simply accepting right now the amount you’d likely be awarded at trial. The only question: Is it possible to write a check for an amount less than one dollar?