Their best wide receiver is 33 years old in his 13th season.
Their best offensive lineman is 32 years old and in his 10th season, unless it’s the one who’s 30 years old and in his eighth season.
Their best defensive lineman is 32 years old and in his 11th season, unless it’s the one who turns 30 in December and is in his ninth season.
Their best cornerback turns 30 on New Year’s Day and is in his eighth season, and their best linebacker is … ahh, I’m not sure they have one.
And what if their best quarterback is 41 and in his 19th season and living in Texas?
OK, that’s a stretch. But that’s the way things are trending with this team.
The Eagles are in a youth movement, and almost all their good players are old.
And that’s a very difficult place for a football team to be.
We’re only two dismal weeks into the 2020 season, but can you think of any Eagles under 28 to be excited about other than Miles Sanders, Jalen Reagor and Dallas Goedert? Maybe Jalen Hurts, although that’s just based on potential.
The worst thing about the Eagles’ 0-2 start is that you can’t dismiss it by saying, “Oh, at least the future is bright.”
Because who exactly is their future?
The Eagles need corners, but their second- and third-round picks from three years ago are gone.
They need pass rushers, but their first-round pick from 2017 has more career penalties (17) than sacks (14). And their fourth-round pick from last year is gone, and the player they acquired for next year’s fourth-round pick wasn’t even active Sunday.
They need wide receivers and they could have had the gifted Terry McLaurin or the spectacular D.K. Metcalf, but instead they’ve got JJ Arcega-Whiteside, who has more drops than catches this year, and he only has one drop.
They’re looking for a running back right now, but the one they drafted in the fourth round in 2017 is out of the league without ever playing a snap.
They need linebackers, but Jordan Hicks is starting for the Cards and L.J. Fort for the Ravens.
There’s no mystery to this. Sometimes it's really simple.
Sometimes bad teams are bad teams because they don’t have enough good players.
And if the first two weeks of this season have reaffirmed anything, it’s that the Eagles’ roster is made up of a handful of solid older veterans, a bunch of kids with uncertain futures and exactly three young players to get excited about.
This is Carson Wentz's mess and it’s Doug Pederson's mess, but in a greater sense it’s Howie Roseman's mess because this roster is his handiwork and after two games it looks perilously thin on talent.
Roseman built a Super Bowl champion out of a strange collection of journeymen, free agents, mid-round draft picks and aging veterans cranking it up for one last run at greatness, and he deserves all the accolades he got for that unforgettable run.
But that team is long gone. Most of those players are long gone. And Roseman's Midas touch seems to be long gone as well. At least, it sure looks that way two weeks in.
Now, maybe some of the rookies like K’Von Wallace, Davion Taylor and Shaun Bradley are stars of the future. Maybe John Hightower or JJAW will become a Pro Bowler. Maybe Derek Barnett or Josh Sweat will suddenly turn into Clyde Simmons. Every young player deserves a chance to develop.
But look at the roster.
Other than Goedert, Sanders and Reagor, the Eagles have seven starters under 28: Nate Herbig, Isaac Seumalo and Wentz on offense and Avonte Maddox, T.J. Edwards, Derek Barnett and Jalen Mills on defense.
That’s your future, and it’s a scary one.
Because if the Eagles are this bad while they still have Jason Kelce, Ertz, Cox, DeSean, Brandon Graham, Rodney McLeod and Malik Jackson, what happens when they’re gone?
It’s not that far off, and so far Roseman just hasn’t been able to find many capable replacements. That's meant overpaying for free agents and getting into cap trouble. Not a recipe for sustained success.
What do you get if you keep losing good players and replacing them with mediocre or bad players?
Just take a look at the Eagles’ last two games for your answer.