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A Ryan Nelsen return to D.C. United? Don’t hold your breath

Tottenham Hotspur v Bolton Wanderers - FA Cup Sixth Round

LONDON, ENGLAND - MARCH 27: Ryan Nelsen (R) of Spurs is congratulated by teammate Rafael Van der Vaart (L) after scoring the opening goal during the FA Cup sixth round match between Tottenham Hotspur and Bolton Wanderers at White Hart Lane on March 27, 2012 in London, England. (Photo by Mike Hewitt/Getty Images)

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Two important things to know about the following post:

First, whenever I can link into a story from New Zealand, land that gave us these two goofballs of hilarious harmony, that’s a “gotta-do.”

Second, if you’re a backer of the Black and Red, and were hoping defender Ryan Nelsen was bound for a second D.C. United shift, prepare to be disappointed.

Nelsen, 34, contributed a huge goal Tuesday against Bolton as Tottenham booked a trip to famed Wembley. Spurs will meet Chelsea there in an FA Cup semi-final after getting by Bolton in the emotional contest.

Afterward, Tottenham manager Harry Redknapp waxed effusive over Nelsen, who had been added fortuitously at White Hart Lane on a free transfer. And by the sound of this report Wednesday out of New Zealand, it sounds like that’s where this popular Kiwi is going to stay for a while, never mind speculative talk of Ryan’s return to his old D.C. United address.

Well, make yourself feel better by watching this bit of Flight of the Conchords brilliance. It is Wednesday, after all. Wednesday, of course, is business time.