The year is 2117.
A hologram of a college professor lectures his class, one with students from around the world, on social activities of the past century.
A student, chimes in, using a hand emoji in Slack to get the professor's attention.
"Why again did people stop playing football?," the student types.
"Ravens 40, Dolphins 0. Thursday, Oct. 26, 2017," the responds. "That's why."
The Ravens' 40-point shellacking of the Dolphins was calamitous and grotesque. It was bad football wrapped in more bad football, presented as appointment viewing on national television.
This wasn't a game worthy of national television. This wasn't a game worthy of being played at all.
The only appointment is the one Joe Flacco will need to have with several doctors after Kiko Alonso attempted to dislodge the quarterback's frontal lobe from his skull.
Alonso's team lost by 40 points.
With Flacco sidelined, the Ravens turned to Ryan Mallett, he of the 66.1 career passer rating at eight career touchdowns to 10 career interceptions.
Mallett finished with 20 yards on 3-of-7 passing and one touchdown. He was also on the receiving end of a straight choke hold from Dolphins defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh.
Suh went full undertaker pic.twitter.com/murssGDH46— △⃒⃘ (@ItsPaoloni) October 27, 2017
Suh's team lost by 40 points.
Matt Moore, the Dolphins quarterback, was not maimed or assaulted by his competition. But he did complete just 25 of his 44 pass attempts, finishing with 176 yards and two interceptions. The Dolphins running backs Jay Ajayi and Kenyan Drake combined for just 45 yards on 19 carries. Their team lost by 40 points.
But it wasn't all bad.
Here is a video of an actual cat running on to the field.
It was the best play of the game.
The Dolphins are more likely to sign this cat than Colin Kaepernick. pic.twitter.com/YBR7AnZSry— Troy Machir (@TroyMachir) October 27, 2017
Back in the future, another student weighs in. "What happened to the cat? Was it OK?"
"Yes and no," the hologram professor responds.
"It made it out of the stadium alive without getting into a fist fight with drunken fans, but the Dolphins decided to pass on signing it because the cat kneeled during the National Anthem."