The 2018 NBA Draft takes place on Thursday, June 21 and once again provides a glimmer of hope for even the most downtrodden franchises.
The NBA Draft is where teams can prepare for the future; where teams can rebuild and reload.
But the NBA Draft is often a crapshoot. Teams waffle on taking the best fit versus the best available player. Teams often panic and rest on laurels of draft years past. Fans like to build draft stereotypes for individual franchises, and while a lot of that is stupid Internet conjecture, it's fun to talk about and is often some actual truth to it.
So what follows is a look at the Doomsday Mock Draft. What your favorite team is likely to do if all else fails, which it often does.
1. Phoenix Suns: A franchise center who spends his first contract working with the Suns' medical staff more than his teammates.
2. Sacramento Kings: Someone who won't be a member of the Kings by the time 2022 rolls around.
3. Atlanta Hawks: Someone that will make Dennis Schroder unhappy.
4. Memphis Grizzlies: A Mike Conley Jr. repair kit.
5. Dallas Mavericks: Not the heir apparent to Dirk Nowitzki.
6. Orlando Magic: A reach that won't pan out.
7. Chicago Bulls: Someone from Iowa State, probably.
8. Cleveland Cavaliers: ANYONE YOU WANT LEBRON JUST PLEASE DON'T LEAVE US AGAIN!!
9. New York Knicks: /inserts .GIF of Spike Lee looking disappointed/
10. Philadelphia 76ers: Another big man because HINKIE 4 LYFE.
11. Charlotte Hornets: A North Carolina Tar Heel.
12. Los Angeles Clippers: A playmate for the head coach's son.
13. Los Angeles Clippers: DeAndre Jordan 2.0.
14. Denver Nuggets: Yet another athletic guard.
15. Washington Wizards: Nope. Not touching this one.
16. Phoenix Suns: Someone to pass Devin Booker the ball.
17. Milwaukee Bucks: Wingspan. Nothing but wingspan.
18. San Antonio Spurs: One of the Space Jam villains who conveniently falls to the Spurs (See: Leonard, Kawhi. Anderson, Kyle. Murray, Dejounte)
19. Atlanta Hawks: Someone to replace Dennis Schroder.
20. Minnesota Timberwolves: Someone who Tom Thibideau can play 60 minutes of a 48-minute game.
21. Utah Jazz: A real glue guy. A gym rat. A high-motor guy. Intangibles. Grit. Moxie.
22. Chicago Bulls: A two-way player who will ultimately get punched in the face by Bobby Portis.
23. Indiana Pacers: DRAFT ANOTHER UCLA PLAYER. WE DARE YOU.
24. Portland Trail Blazers: DRAFT ANOTHER MID-MAJOR GUARD. WE DARE YOU.
25. Los Angeles Lakers: The subject of Lonzo Ball's next diss track.
26. Philadelphia 76ers: A pallet of knockoff burner phones.
27. Boston Celtics: A draft night trade for more draft picks they probably won't use.
28. Golden State Warriors: An unfairly good player.
29. Brooklyn Nets: An unfairly bad player.
30. Atlanta Hawks: We ran out of Dennis Schroder jokes.
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