Kyle Long's header photo on Twitter is a picture of a keychain that says 'May The Bridges I Burn Light The Way' which will make alllllll the sense in the world if you keep reading for, like, 20 more seconds.
You see, Kyle Long retired during the 2019 NFL season. His play had declined, the injuries were piling up, and the everyday grind of a football season didn't seem worth it anymore. What followed was pretty standard fare in today's league: testing new career waters with various media appearances, impressive pictures of dramatic weight loss, and the occasional golf joke or six.
Then, a random rumor about flirtation between Long and the Jets showed up on Twitter. That was kind of weird, right? Isn't Kyle Long retired as hell? Kyle Long seems retired as hell.
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Turns out, NOPE. Not how Kyle feels:
(Me too Kyle I have never tried to holler back after being dumped, we are definitely on the same page about that.)
But reader! It gets better!
And then, Kyle threw his Sunday punch:
Kyle: Thank you for this. I mean that sincerely. Without these tweets, we would have probably just spent our 500th straight day trying to dissect whose motivational juice will propel them into the starting QB job. Twitter is terrible about everything, all the time, except for when Kyle Long logs on to talk about the Bears. Then, just for a brief moment, it all feels worth it.