[/extremely Frodo when he gets rid of the ring voice] It's gone. It's done.
Rest your eyes, friend. Manny Machado and Bryce Harper are now gainfully employed. They'll be making roughly a bazillion dollars over the next decade and a half -- and rightfully so.
Now that San Diego and Philly have reeled in their big fishes, how does the the MLB landscape look? Are the Nats ready to watch Harper crush their best pitchers 19 times a year? How many times can the White Sox handle being friend-zoned? Have the Cubs been made aware that their soulmate, PECOTA, now thinks the Padres might lowkey be better?
The answers to all these campy one-lines lie in our *newly updated* MLB Power Rankings!