Wanna buy B.J. Upton’s house?

B.J. Upton’s Tampa home is for sale for $1.6 million. Sounds like a nice joint. Word is that the ventilation is great, provided by ceiling fans with baseball bats for blades which, in keeping with the owner’s habits, cut swiftly and silently into the humid night air:

Inside, the two-story residence boats a host of luxury appointments, including a wrought-iron staircase in the foyer, vaulted ceilings and wood flooring throughout. An entertainer’s dream, Upton’s home features a host of high-end amenities, including a custom wine cellar, a media room and a gourmet kitchen with top-tier appliances. The all-star pad rounds out with a resort-style pool with a spa, a poolside kitchen and a tiki wet bar.

Pretty nice as far as these things go, though since he’s obviously not lived in the thing for months it has that “real estate agent rented some furniture for showings and now it looks like a model home” feel that so many of these ballplayer houses do. I feel like Upton has a bit more style about him than what is shown here. At any rate, if you hired a decent decorator this could be a pretty happening place.

And note: the fact that Realtor.com puts Upton’s batting line in the listing and notes his season-long struggles is pretty awesome. Baseball fans over there.