It’s been over a year since he last wore a major league baseball uniform so we’re probably at the point where a story about Elijah Dukes getting arrested is less about a ballplayer in trouble with the law than it is about a criminal who happened to once play ball. Still, for old times sake:
Suspended license? It’s like he’s not even trying anymore. Dukes’ crimes used to be so much more ugly and require so much more criminal intent than this. A suspended license is just plain laziness. He’s become a shell of his former self.
If Dukes wants to be relevant in his chosen field again, he’s really going to have to raise the stakes. Elijah: have you considered light treason?