The Bills and defensive tackle Ed Oliver had decided not to announce that Oliver’s young son had died in late June. The news was reported on Friday. It forced the Bills to acknowledge it on Saturday.
After Saturday’s preseason game, coach Joe Brady addressed the situation.
“I’m a parent, right?” Brady told reporters. “And ever since I found out, it’s really hard and I can’t fathom what he’s going through. There’s really not words to describe it. As a coach, as a father, it’s my job to be what he needs right now, and that’s loving him and giving him the privacy that he deserves. Whatever it looks like, no matter how someone might want to handle it, it’s however he wants us to handle it, and go through it.”
The apparent justification for reporting the development before Oliver or the Bills could announce it arose from the perception that the Bills possibly were attributing his absence from the team to a phantom injury.
"[H]e’s not here right now because of an injury and he’s dealing with that,” Brady said. “This wasn’t the reason why he’s not here, but it’s unfortunate, the way that it came out, but I respect a lot of you guys and you might have known about it, and [the way you] handled it. That’s part of journalism as well, but I appreciate your guys’ hearts and understanding the human elements of it. It’s hard. You know, it’s hard when I see him and I can’t imagine. I haven’t had the words since, and I don’t really have the words, but all I can do is just be there for him . . . in whatever way that he needs.”
In situations like this, everyone has to make a decision as to whether the details of a player’s personal tragedy will be reported before the player is ready to share them. The problem is that, even if every other reporter who knew about it decided to give Oliver the time and space to announce it on his own, it only takes one to decide to handle it differently.
That’s what happened here. Absent evidence that it’s anything more than a personal tragedy, it’s hard to justify going there. Which perhaps explains the attempt to make the news relevant by suggesting that the Bills weren’t being truthful about Oliver’s absence. Regardless of whether Oliver actually is injured.
