Former major leaguer Aubrey Huff spoke with Buster Olney of ESPN earlier this week and revealed that he was addicted to Adderall in the later stages of his career and that, in 2014, he contemplated suicide. Indeed, at one point he was holding a gun to his head, ready to pull the trigger.
Huff’s conversation with Olney can be heard on Olney’s podcast from Wednesday. In it Huff says that he started taking Adderall in 2009, when one of his Baltimore Orioles teammates gave him some to deal with a hangover (Huff said he was drinking every day back then). He soon became hooked and could not play without it. Adderall, of course, is a banned substance in Major League Baseball as it’s a stimulant. Many players use if via therapeutic exemptions for attention deficit disorder. Indeed, a larger percentage of players get such exemptions for it than the rate of ADD occurrence in adults in the population at large, leading many to suspect that some are getting the drug specifically to enhance performance. Huff:
Huff described a depression which set in after that season, when he was coming down off the drug, not needing it while not on the playing field. And, indeed, he has been off the drug since 2012. But he has still dealt with anxiety and depression. And has endured at least one strikingly harrowing episode:
Huff also talks about a gambling addiction he suffered during this time.
Huff says he’s dealing with all of that much better now and feels healthier than he has in years. That’s good to hear. But it’s certainly scary to hear what he’s been through. One hopes those bad days are behind him.