Self-Talk Struggles
NOTE: Thank you all for your very positive responses to last weeks article. Infinite Golf is now a new workshop and program being delivered to clubs, organizations, teams and individuals who want to learn the insights and strategies that teach you to demonstrate the characteristics of the Infinite Golf performer. You can learn more by visiting www.theflowzone.net/index.php?q=node/105
And now todays article
Self-Talk is something you hear and read a lot about. Self-talk is a phrase that is often used to describe the inner dialogue we have with ourselves and this dialogue can be filled with positive or negative phrases.
Most of the people who contact me are very familiar with the notion of self-talk and why its important to try and use it in a positive manner. Here is where the real challenge begins. I know many people who have paid anywhere from hundreds to thousands of dollars to be told to be more positive and talk to your self in more positive ways. All good advice, right? Then why do so many people find it so challenging?
I can honestly say, in 20 years as a Performance Coach, Ive yet to suggest to a client to be more positive. Nick and Janna, collegiate golfers were referred to me and the first thing they asked was, Are you going to tell us the same thing we hear all the time about being more positive? They have been trained, like many people have, to believe that this is the accepted and expected approach. No I said, Do you want to hear the same things youve already heard many times? I asked. Not really they replied. Good, then were off to a good start!
Obviously the way you talk to yourself is important and it does influence what you do and the outcomes you get. Nick, Janna and many of my clients express frustration because they try to be positive and yet somehow they say it doesnt work. They continue to experience an inner struggle between trying talk positively to themselves and actually feeling it. I call what theyre doing a cut and paste approach. For most people this is not very effective because in effect they are trying to put new wine into old bottles and the space just isnt there for it to stick! If you have a full glass of wine and try to add more into the already full glass, what happens? It overflows because there is no space for the new wine to occupy. Nick and Janna were having this exact experience. The advice given to them was to think and speak more positively. The advice isnt ineffectivethe way they were trying to assimilate it was. The challenge they had was not realizing the new self-talk was running up against old negative beliefs that were already occupying the space. The result: frustration.
Self-talk is very, very important. All the best players in the world will tell you that they try to remember positive images and speak to themselves in positive ways. However, in order for self-talk to have its greatest impactit must have the space to occupy so that it can really impact you. When you truly believe your self talk it will impact you in powerful ways!
To Your Best Golf!
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