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Bond beats Bolt for “Most Influential Man”

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We’re not sure what’s worse: that James Bond, a fictional character, was named the Most Influential Man of 2012 (in October, no less), or that he earned it over actual humans in an online popular vote.

Either way, the superspy, who returns to the screen in “Skyfall” next month (bated breath) barely beat out world record sprinter Usain Bolt for the top spot in an AskMen.com poll. The Jamaican finished second, ten spots ahead of No. 12 Michael Phelps, who was recently named the “Fittest Man of All-time” by Men’s Health magazine.

All three men were fixtures of the London Summer Games, but only one - Bond - got to jump out of a helicopter with the Queen. Bolt had to settle for becoming the first man ever to win both the 100m and 200m in consecutive Games and Phelps only became the most decorated Olympian ever.

LeBron James, also technically an Olympian after winning his second straight gold with Team USA - right after securing his first NBA ring - ended up in 32nd place, just 18 spots behind the replacement refs, a group of men who almost systematically destroyed American football as we know it.