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Jury selection in Clemens case drags along, has its moments of entertainment

Roger Clemens

Former Major League Baseball pitcher Roger Clemens arrives at federal court in Washington, Monday, July 11, 2011, as jury selection continued in his trial on charges of lying to Congress in 2008 when he denied ever using performance-enhancing drugs. (AP Photo/Alex Brandon)

AP

We’re three days into jury selection in the Roger Clemens perjury case and they still don’t have 12 people in the box. Like I said last week: it happens. It can be slow if everyone is being super thorough, and that appears to be the case here.

But hey, it’s not our meter running on Rusty Hardin’s legal fees, and the prosecutors who are being paid by our taxes are on salary, so no need for us to fret about it. Besides, there has been some great fun in the jury selection process that we wouldn’t have had if they did it like your run of the mill armed robbery case and sat the panel quickly. Fun like this:

One woman who made it through to the next round is a former attorney turned yoga instructor who said she saw some of Clemens’ congressional testimony and thought ''he seemed sincere.’' The judge asked her, ''''Have you ever heard about performance enhancing drugs in yoga?’' She said no, ''we tend to be vegetarians.’' But she thinks that some drugs should be legal and U.S. drug laws ''are a bit heavy-handed.’'

Another potential juror, a lawyer for the Federal Communications Commission, said she does not watch sports on television and doesn’t even know how to turn on the TV at home. She said her husband told her it looked like she was being called for the Clemens jury and she got him confused with all-star Pittsburgh Pirates right fielder Roberto Clemente, who she apparently didn’t realize died in 1972


Another woman praised Michael Vick and said “I thought he was done wrong.” Seriously.

I’m guessing that the prosecutors kept her and the yoga lady off the jury. Unclear how the no-TV/Roberto Clemente woman cuts. I’d probably not want her on any jury I had to persuade of anything. Without decades of TV softening her brain, she may not be as malleable as others.

Oh, and given that she works for the FCC -- the people who regulate television content -- and that she doesn’t watch TV should probably tell you something, folks. And I’ll just come out and say it: all non-sports television content is designed to destroy and control your lives. Except the stuff on NBC, that is. No problems there, I can assure you.

(thanks to Kiwicricket for the heads up)