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Those guys who stole Evan Longoria’s Camaro: Worst. Auto. Thieves. Ever.

Grand Theft Auto

Remember the Evan Longoria GTA? You kind of figured that was a one-and-done story, but I guess not:

Police in a Phoenix suburb are searching for a stolen 1967 Camaro belonging to Tampa Bay All-Star third baseman Evan Longoria ... The Camaro and a classic 1970 Buick belonging to someone else were stolen from a fenced yard last weekend as they awaited restoration work. Chandler police say they recovered the Buick on Tuesday. A man walking his dog found the car abandoned near a vacant warehouse in Queen Creek, some 15 miles southeast of Chandler.

Really? Abandoned? Back when I was a boy, car thieves got their merch into a chop shop within minutes of boosting it and the remains were on their way to shady parts dealers withing the hour. Now they’re just abandoning the stuff by the side of the road? And police actually think they’ll recover the Camaro too?

Man, kids these days have no ambition or work ethic. Makes me sad, really.