Derek Jeter is afraid of cats. Likes Baskin Robbins. And other important stuff about him.

Remember the end of the classic “Simpsons” episode, “Last Exit to Springfield,” when Mr. Burns realize he may have been overestimating his adversary and says, “I’m beginning to think that Homer Simpson is not the brilliant tactician I thought he was”? Well, after the Twitter chat Derek Jeter had today to promote his new “Players’ Tribune” thing, you can substitute Derek Jeter for Homer Simpson and “interesting personality” for “brilliant tactician.”

.@Shinman116 I’m scared of cats -DJ

— The Players’ Tribune (@PlayersTribune) October 1, 2014

.@mslaura5284 Days of Our Lives when I was younger. I had a crush on Hope -DJ

— The Players’ Tribune (@PlayersTribune) October 1, 2014

.@carminooch43 Ice cream. Gold medal ribbon from Baskin Robbins -DJ

— The Players’ Tribune (@PlayersTribune) October 1, 2014

I suppose it’s our fault if we assumed he was intriguing in ways that he really isn’t. He’s never pretended to be interesting. I guess I was just holding out hope that he, I dunno, fought crime and killed his sensei in a battle or something.

In other news, has anyone besides me wondered what people would say if Alex Rodriguez announced that he was launching a vanity publishing project in the middle of the playoffs? I almost feel as though someone might accuse him of trying to upstage things and to use the timing of it all to benefit his personal interests.

But I suppose that’s crazy talk.